Friday, December 18, 2009

This afternoon, Gracie stood up from a seated position and tried to take some steps by herself. She is still WAY too unsteady to walk on her own, but it is so wonderful to try.

However, we are no closer to an answer to the low grade fever question than we were a week ago. Gracie started these low grade temperatures almost 2 weeks ago now. She had gotten a GI bug and ran a temp. along with nausea and vomiting. Well, the nausea and vomiting have been gone since 2 days later, but the temperature remains. So, today, Dr. Christina came in and cleaned her ears of all the build up from the surgery(she has been on ear drops to help)...I really hoped for an ear infection. I sounds terrible, but I'm just being honest. No ear infection though. Ears look great, as a matter of fact. So, I'm half glad, half disappointed. Then she checked her mouth, because at one point the nurses in the PICU thought they saw a cavity (which wouldn't be that shocking, being that she had NO oral care for 2 weeks!), but she didn't see any areas of redness. There is one tooth that looks like it might have a little cavity, but she's not a dentist so she can't be sure. She was looking for a mean looking, blazing red infection. Again, being the wonderful mom that I am...I was a little disappointed. I just want an answer.

I realize that it sounds silly. After everything that has happened, I am hung up on a temperature that I wouldn't even call the doctor for before. For that matter, I wouldn't have even known what it was...I would have never taken her temp unless she acted sick! See, the thing is, this isn't before. I can never go back to before. I have accepted that. I have accepted that this is our new normal. I accepted three years ago when she was born that OUR normal would never be the same as other people's. I have not accepted that I let her down though, and I will not do it again...

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